3 min read
Today started off yesterday as I got a rejuvenating 0 hours of sleep. Believe it or not, I was actually in a pretty good mood regardless of it. I was dancing around to some nostalgic 80's songs while getting ready for the day at 5:30 am whereas I can barely drag myself out of bed before 9:30 normally. I figured, hey well if I can't get any sleep, I might as well make myself useful and get going early.
According to the calendar, today's forecast called for scattered meetings so I wasn't expecting to get much done. Quite the opposite. I was almost hyperactive from my lack of sleep. I arrived at the office a little after 6. It's kind of spooky at that hour regardless of the fact that I've been there that early twice. It's pretty dim and eerily quiet for being in the middle of Manhattan. Nevertheless I was still scootering and dancing around having a grand old time.
For almost the entire morning I had a probably creepy-looking grin on my face. I felt like my expression was something like that grin Totoro makes.
For anyone who has no idea what I'm talking about
Today was such a whirlwind and on a fried brain I actually don't remember all of it. People kept telling me to take a nap but I was too wound up. I juggled all my meetings and rounds of reviews on 3 different changelists, actually getting 2 of them approved and and one of them submitted. One of the approved ones was the Go code I had written, which reminds me...
These are only given to Go programmers
This one's special since purple isn't available in the online store
My desk is looking a little less barren with this stuffed purple gopher. I got it after explaining to another Googler what I was doing with Go for my internship project. Its face perfectly described my anxiety levels later in the day after getting off of a video conference with my recruiter. Thinking about converting to full-time is stressing me out as I only have 5 weeks to prepare since they prefer to schedule the interviews the second-to-last week of the internship.
By dinnertime, my brain was so fried that talking to a friend as I was grabbing dessert and wondering why I wasn't very hungry, I was struggling to even remember where and what I had for lunch. Thankfully I just had one more team meeting after dinner from 7 to 8 pm (which isn't even mandatory, but I feel better when I actually show up). After that, I made sure to tie up any lose ends with my daily progress notes and leave my workstation before 9.
In terms of expectations for the internship today I found out today that I'm consistently meeting them. I'm good about working extra hours to make sure that I'm constantly making progress. The only problem is that this is actually bad considering I'm working time and a half (60 hours compared to the expected 40) to only meet expectations, which in my mind raises a major red flag. I'm not expected to put in that many hours. My mentor actually discourages me from doing it but the whole point was to exceed expectations.
I'm going to have to change something because this obviously isn't sustainable. So somehow I'm going to have to increase my efficiency by 50% to feel satisfied with my progress, which is also obviously easier said than done. Thankfully there's still time to turn things around but still time is running out quickly.